Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Worse Than Gigli

Upon the release of the Paris Hilton crapfest The Hottie and the Nottie famed hatchet man Joe Queenan takes on the discussion of the worst movie of all time. You pretty much have to agree with his conclusion, but really it's the debate leading up to it that makes it worth reading. It's sentences like this: "Madonna's Swept Away ... seems more amateurish on each viewing, like a morass that starts out as a quagmire, then morphs into a cesspool and finally turns into a slime pit on the road to its ultimate destination in the bowels of Hell."

As an aside, I have to disagree with Queenan on one point. LimeyG and I can report having watched La Grande Bouffe and found it to be pretty interesting in a decadent 70s European sort of way. It's really not on a par with Sextette or anything.

3 comments:

LimeyG said...

There are really many kinds of bad. I think Ghost is one of the most execrable movies ever made, yet it won Oscars and made millions.

Similarly, there's "so painfully terrible that I'd rather stick pins in my eyes" bad and "so hilariously crappy that I want to see it again" bad. Unfortunately, El will not allow me to watch Battlefield Earth again.

KP said...

Jean Claude van Damme's "Cyborg"...Worst...Movie...Ever!

Lacking on action set pieces so the movie is carried by JCvD's acting skills. Hilarity does not ensue.

El said...

Unless Cyborg brought down a whole studio, it cannot compete with the awesome destructive power of Heaven's Gate. However, I am perfectly willing to believe that a movie called Cyborg starring JCVD would suck in almost every conceivable way.