Sweary Sopranos Swear-a-thon

If you knitted together every expletive from all 86 episodes of the Sopranos into one long thread, it would be 27 minutes long. Which is less than one might expect.

How to make an (expletive deleted) cocktail

Take:

• One part Christian Bale
• One part Bill O'Reilly

Muddle together.
Garnish with an overblown sense of importance.

Crank up your speakers and enjoy.

Things That Make Me Laugh

The following is a collection of assorted crap I find hilarious right now:

1) Baby Mangino

It started off innocently enough, with proud parents dressing up their tubby toddler as Kansas head football coach/gigantic fatty Mark Mangino. Somehow, this photo ended up on Deadspin, becoming enough of a sensation to warrant nomination for their annual Sports Human of the Year Award (SHOTY.) Lo and behold, the chubby child went from 11th seed to finalist, facing off against award-winning author/loudmouth Luddite Buzz Bisinger, whose most notable accomplishement was cursing out Deadspin editor Will Leitch on HBO. This final battle has even prompted a human interest story on a local TV news station. Personally, I've voted for the baby several times, because after several weeks of seeing that fat face, I still find the photo hilarious.

2) The Viz description of Steve Irwin's death

As they so eloquently put it: "he was stang off a fish."

3) Enrazzlement

The aforementioned Viz enclosed a 2009 calendar titled Enrazzlement in their December issue, described as "The Periodical that Effects Tumescence in the Male Generative Member." It features lovely photos of Victorian maids showing off their ankles. A typical monthly description reads like this:

Miss June

One of Rose's dearest undertakings is attending to the dusting of the withdrawing room. In this delectable series of gravures, our photolithographer has encapsulated her whilst she is paying singular attention to the bell jars. Oh, posits The Editor on behalf of his many gentlemen patrons, that she would pay an homogeneous attention to ours.

4) Imaginary conversation with Steve Martin

From the always-amusing Mediation Tumblr site. Sample line: "Okay. Well, new topic then. Did I ever tell you I loved the 1983 Seattle Seahawks?" Just read it.