LIveblogging Nathan's Hot Dog Eating Competition

We've had updates on Kobayashi's jaw arthritis, a story on a competitor whose day job involves fixing diet food for a catering company (oh, the irony!), and a short bio of Joey Chestnut. And a big rule change: the timeframe has gone from 12 minutes to the original 10.

The crowd at Coney Island is huge, spilling out onto the street. There are a lot of fat people. A lot.

Okay, here we go.

Competitiors include:
A guy in a tux with a hot-dog-garnished martini;
Some douche from Boston;
"Crazy Legs Conti," the lumberjack-breakfast-eating champ;
Some other douche who claims winning the contest "would not change his life";
A big fat bald guy;
A Puerto Rican in a fur coat with a boombox made from a suitcase;
Douche #3, a jalapeno-eating champ;
Six-foot-five 400lbs Badlands Booker;
105 lbs Juliet Lee (a girl!);
A 65-year-old guy from Vegas;
A guy in a Cubs Mexican-wrestler mask who once ate 8.5 lbs of blueberry pie, hands-free
A "faith-based eater," known as the Billy Graham of Ham;
A vegetarian who only eats meat in sanctioned competition
Sonya "Black Widow" Thomas (last year's women's champ);
Eater X, who once ate 171 pieces of sushi in 6 minutes
And ... there he is! Takeru Kobayashi, looking to win back the title from:
Joey Chestnut, the Clay Aiken of bacon.

The dogs are cooked, the judges are primed, the excitement is palpable.

And they're off. The eating begins.

Kobayashi is cramming them down. Okay, this is gross. It looks like people vomiting in reverse. Kobayashi's at seven dogs, but Chestnut is at 12 at the end of the first minute. The fat guy is all like "nom nom nom."

Chestnut and Kobayashi are separating from the rest of the pack. A giant hotdog is applauding. Juliet Lee's mouth is stuffed with sausage.

Chestnut: 22; Kobayashi: 18

Chestnut is averaging 8 dogs a minute; at that pace, he could do 80 by the end. And/or die.

Kobayashi once ate 17.5lbs of cow brains. But he's slowing down.

At halftime, it's 35 to 33. Chestnut is slowing down also. He's sweating.

They're TIED! Chestnut is really really struggling. He looks pained.

Someone's gonna hurl; I can feel it.

The announcer just said "What I know is this: Kobayashi and Chestnut can eat, and they can eat very quickly." That, my friends, is insight.

They're still tied: 47 a piece.

And Kobayashi takes the lead with 2.5 minutes left. Also, his hair looks awesome dyed red and gold.

The beast Kobayashi is calmly putting away his 56th; Chestnut looks like he's almost done.

And the winner: IT'S A TIE! Fifty-nine dogs each!

Or is it? A representative from Major League Eating is checking into the results. Is this a first? Yes! Never before has this happened. History is being made today!

Oh lordy, they're gonna do penalties: a five-dog eat-off. This is going to be brutal.

How ridiculous is this thing? Kobayashi is trailing slightly.

And Chestnut wins. I'm sad; Kobayashi should have won. Chestnut claims the difference between the two passionate competitors was that Kobayashi wanted the win, "but I needed it more."

Really? You needed to win? At eating?

But at least no one threw up.

El's summary: Good God, that Joey Chestnut is not only a prodigious eater of pie, but also a fucker of same. The most incredible thing about the event was that Kobayashi ate 64 hot dogs without breaking a sweat or winning.