2:15 PM - It's almost time for the big game. We're preparing by avoiding all pre-game coverage and watching SpongeBob SquarePants instead.
2:25 PM - The national anthems are pre-recorded so they bang through both in the time it takes your average American Idol winner to do the first verse.
2:30 PM - Almost time for kickoff. I watched five minutes of pre-game crap and it was too much.
1' - Slow going at the start. A helpful graphic reminds us that England is ranked 8th and the US 14th, so we're looking at teams that likely won't make it out of the quarterfinals without a bit of luck.
3' - GOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLL Gerrard! England 1- USA 0. Beautiful pass from Heskey sets up a wide open Gerrard for the score. US defense screwed the pooch on that one.
6' - The goal is the only sustained attack so far, most of the action is happening in midfield.
8' - The US almost had a breakaway but John Terry cleaned it up easily.
9' - England free kick turns into a corner. US hasn't done much at all so far.
10' - Clint Dempsey heads in the first American shot, a two-hopper that's easily handled. England counters by sailing a shot over the goal from miles away. As I recall that was their entire offensive plan from four years ago.
12' - US gets three straight corner kicks that end up on an errant crossing pass and no shots on goal.
15' - England is dominating most of the action and showing more effort so far.
17' - Kudos to South Africa for developing the one cheering instrument more annoying than thunder sticks.
18' - Donovan's cross is just missed by Altidore, best shot for the US so far.
19' - Lennon and then Rooney counter with great opportunities for England. This may have been the first time Rooney had touched the ball all game.
23' - Pace has slowed down again, more at the usual England speed.
25' - England's Milner gets handed a yellow card for whining. It was deserved. Morever, his foul sets up a free kick for the US. The US then promptly heads it out.
27' - Heskey's cross overshoots Rooney on a breakaway.
28' - Another cross almost finds Heskey in front of the goal, but he slides right into the chest of Howard the US goalkeeper instead. Howard is now down in the field.
30' - Wright-Phillips replaces Milner who got yellow-carded and has looked crappy so far. Howard stays in the game.
33' - The US is getting some chances on the offensive end but not doing much with any of them. England has threatened more often.
37' - Another long shot from England goes wide. Rooney is at least handling the ball sometimes.
38' - Donovan's shot just goes wide of the net. Best US try so far. Cherundolo (what kind of name is that?) responds quickly with a yellow card.
39' - GOAL DEMPSEY! England 1 - USA 1. He bounces a three-hopper right at Green the England goalkeeper who somehow bobbles it into the goal. Man that was embarrassing. He's going to be crucified on the tabloids and everywhere else.
40' - Glen Johnson has a good shot stopped by Howard, who, you know, is a competent keeper.
43' - Heskey is down after a collision. Bad news since he's been really good today. First time I've seen him be useful.
Halftime - After three minutes of stoppage time it's halftime. Man, England should feel like shit with that score after they've pretty much dominated the action. I would not want to be Rob Green right about now. I wonder if he can apply for political asylum in South Africa. I think it would be safer for him. The
Guardian minute-by-minute blog chime in with "America enjoys English spill."
46' - Another substitution for England as Carragher comes in for King on defense.
48' - Lennon made a nice run down the right side but his cross goes just behind Rooney.
51' - Heskey had a clean breakaway with Rooney on his left but Howard stops his shot. England has had a few strong chances in the second half.
53' - Heskey's core competency is being offsides.
56' - TV graphic shows that the US-England series is 7-2-0 in favor of England. There's always a first time for a draw.
59' - Carragher gets a yellow card for a stupid foul in midfield. I blame Beckham's presence for the idiotic play of the English today.
60' - Now Gerrard gets a yellow for spiking Dempsey. Free kick for the USA from the left of the penalty area ends up headed out of bounds.
62' - Lampard's shot is handled by Howard. The difference in goalkeeping competence is vast.
64' - Altidore blows past Carragher on the left side but hits the post. Close call for England there.
65' - Glen Johnson has a bloody lip which is holding up the action. England now playing one man down.
67' - Johnson is back for an England free kick. Both teams have made good runs this half but no luck.
68' - Lampard boots the free kick 20 yards over the goal. Would have been a great field goal, though.
70' - Gerrard cross for a wide-open Rooney just misses his big thick head. Excellent opportunity for England is wasted again.
72' - Findley breakaway is handled by Carragher but only barely.
73' - Findley called for a yellow for mugging Gerrard. Rooney just misses a long shot from the left of the penalty area.
75' - Rooney sets up Wright-Phillips who puts it right in Howard's hands. England is really pressuring hard but has nothing to show for it.
76'- Gerrard cross is headed out by Heskey. Yet another strong opportunity for England. US replaces Findley with Buddle.
78' - Corner kick from England is cleared by the US. Crouch comes in for Heskey. England can use a freakishly tall striker right about now.
80' - The US intercepts a pass on their offensive end and puts up a mild offensive, their first in eight minutes or so.
82' - If you look at just the action and not the score, you'd think England was trailing and frantically trying to tie it up.
83' - Four-on-two breakaway for England ends up petering out. Good defense by the US.
85' - Rooney keeps complaining about calls. What a chav! US replaces Altidore with Holden.
86' - Header from Crouch goes nowhere. He has to be the most awkward-looking footballer ever.
88' - Donovan long shot sails over goal. This reeks of 1-1 draw.
90' - Corner kick for USA. Will Green screw up again? Four minutes of stoppage time.
92' - Crouch gets called for a foul for looking like a freak. Good call.
It's over: a 1-1 draw that should feel like a defeat for England and a relief for the US. Let the crucifixion of Rob Green begin! Can't wait for the tabloids.
