Happy Thanksgiving, Everybody!

Today, let us celebrate the True Meaning of the Holiday with America's favorite wife-shooting, homosexual junkie whose grandfather invented the adding machine. Via Wonkette, who also provided a helpful link to the text.

I am a turkey! Eat me!

American Capitalism vs. Chinese Democracy

Less than two hours to go to get your free Dr. Pepper as promised due to the years overdue release of Guns 'N' Roses "Chinese Democracy"!

Go to Dr. Pepper.com or call 1-888-DRPEPPER (1-888-377-3773) before 6 PM Eastern Monday, 11/24. Maybe. Technical difficulties today mean that the end time may shift, but no details, yet.

Get your hands off the remote, you damn dirty ape!

From io9.com (sci-fi site): Stuff yourself with holiday treats, then settle in for a massive Planet of The Apes marathon over at the Fox Movie Channel. Four days of Apey goodness starting at 8 PM and going all the way through Sunday. The highlights include (presented in widescreen) Planet of the Apes, Beneath the Planet of the Apes, Escape from the Planet of the Apes, Conquest of the Planet of the Apes and a few TV Ape movies like Treachery and Greed on the Planet of the Apes and Farewell to the Planet of the Apes.

Lolpolitics perfection

What everyone's getting for xmas

Jeppson's Malört will fill the void left by Zima's departure.

Some kind of special mustache

Get the latest news satire and funny videos at 236.com.

What Are Your Hopes? What Are Your Dreams?

While I wasn't looking, SOSH turned into a gossip site.

Socialism in action

For everyone who thought it wouldn't be so bad to have a socialist pres-o-dent, here's food for thought from England:



In an attempt to spread the wealth of nylon, e-MANcipate (geddit? MAN-cipate?) believes men should feel as comfortable in pantyhose as women. First mistake; they're never comfortable. Their site includes instructions on how to wear them, where to buy them, and--saddest of all--a competition to find an actual female willing to go on record as admitting to liking men who look like douches in pantyhose.

This is what we have to look forward to. Thanks a lot, Obama.

A Return to Traditional Values

With recent events, it is encouraging that someone has the courage to stand up and try to stave off ideas that do not fit with our core values. One man has something to say about our lost direction.